Praṇamāmi Guru Tīrtha Padaṁ

Guru Maharaj would always instruct me in a very gentle way. He knew I couldn't handle much criticism. I'm quite a fragile person, so Guru Maharaj was always very gentle communicating things I could have done better. Sometimes it was so subtle, He would just look at me for 2 seconds and I could understand what I did wrong. So gentle. Bindu Madhava Prabhu would often say, "Guru Maharaj gives exactly the right medicine in the right dosage for each person. Whatever they could take, he would give just the right amount." One time, however, Srila Guru Maharaj directly corrected me in front of everybody. It was during Tulsi worship when he used to come out into the library in Kolkata math. This happened because at that time I was cooking my own prasadam. Because of health problems, I needed to control my diet and wouldn't take the math prasad. He would always ask everyone, "Have you taken prasadam?" And when he asked me directly one day, I said, "No, Guru M...

Srila Gurudev told us about when he was in a college either in Cooch Behar or in Cotton College, Guwahati. While he was there, his roommate spoke roughly to him every day. He was not very senior to Gurudev, only about one year. But Gurudev was such a sadhu that he said nothing. He never spoke ill words towards anyone. Persons who have a tendency to lord over others often speak continuously. When they find a simple person who doesn’t argue, they just keep speaking abusive words and don’t stop. Only if someone argues back, they may shut the mouth. Yet Guru Maharaj never reacted or said a word. Every day, that person continued going on like that. Srila Gurudev told us that one day when his roommate started with this, he extended his cloth forward and told that person, “I am collecting all your abusive words and giving them back to you. I give these back.” On several occasions, Srila Gurudev offered to shift to another room but the roommate would not allow him to do so, probab...

Once when we were going out for Nagar Sankirtan I witnessed that  it started to rain very heavily—there was a huge downpour. Guruji said maybe Indra does not want us to go outside today. He called Srikant Prabhu and asked him to sing “Kripa karo ham par Shyama sundar hey bhakta vatsal kahalane vale….” As soon as prabhuji finished singing that kirtan the rain stopped and devotees went out on Sankirtan and came back to the math after some time. Then it started raining once again. Devotees have seen another incident like this in Simla. We saw that when Guruji was singing in Nagar sankirtan, there was no rain but rain would follow him from behind. The residents of Simla were surprised to see this and were attracted to him and his kirtans. Later many took Harinam and Diksha from him. Guru Maharaj would give me some money for arrangements of katha and kirtan programs. I  would reply, "No Guruji, all arrangements are made, everything is taken care off",  but Guru Mah...

Srila Gurudeva’s disappearance pastime has shown me how the transcendental sound of mantra can connect us with Srila Gurudev and how happy he is when we singing Maha Mantra and Srila Bhaktivinode Thakur's songs for his satisfaction. Since last January I felt so much pain in my body and strong desire to move to Kolkata and spend more time with Srila Gurudev. This pain was only increasing, I was crying and one week before his health problems began, I had just wanted to leave my job. Already I had talked with my boss and coworkers that I am wasting my time in the job and will go to India where I can do the eternal job. I was surprised by what is going on with me and could not control my mind, my speech. I had no fear but complete trust that I am doing right. That time I did not know what is Krishna's desire for Srila Gurudev regarding his apparent health problems. Then I got information about Gurudeva's heart condition and I prayed for his darsan. By his mercy, everything...

2017 was the first year I attended Vyasa Puja without having any idea that this would be the last opportunity while Srila Gurudeva was still physically present with us here. On 93rd Vyasa Puja of Srila Gurudev, we stayed in Kolkata Math for one full week from 3rd April 2017 to 10th April. It was a very happy and joyous time with math buzzing with devotees. The Days filled with soulful kirtans by devotees and Harikathas from Guruvarga and was very memorable in the association of hundreds of godbrothers and godsisters. It was all by His blessings only that we had darsan of Gurudev's Vyasa Puja, got a chance to offers flowers and pranams at His Divine Lotus Feet, got charanamrta, and participated in the grand celebrations that was observed in the Math and Uttama Manch auditorium, heard glories of Gurudev to heart's content, also advice from guru-varga on sadhan-bhajan. Staying for 4-5 days after Vyasa Puja and taking Gurudev's darsan daily morning and evening, returned ...

I offer my unlimited humble obeisances at Srila Gurudeva’s lotus feet and pray for his mercy so that I can continue to serve him with love and devotion for the rest of my life and forever after. My experience of Srila Gurudeva’s disappearance from this world taught me many valuable lessons in life and in Krsna consciousness, and I hope that by sharing these experiences others will be inspired in their service to Guru and Krsna. I was supervising the men’s asrama at the Krishna House, the preaching center I stay at when I heard of Srila Gurudeva's heart attack. I was hoping that  Srila Gurudeva would miraculously recover like he did over three years ago at the Guwahati hospital, but as the days went on, Gurudeva’s health updates made it clear that he was planning on disappearing from our vision this time. I was amazed to find out that the doctor’s declared that no one could live in a body with such a low heart rate and multi-organ failure, and I understood from this th...

I remember all of our Gurudev’s daughters and sons who were in Kolkata Math doing Sankirtan with hope.
 When some news came that there is some improvement in Gurudev’s situation, we went to take prasad. A sweet was also served that night because of the improvement news. When I reached back to join the Sankirtan on the top floor, there were few devotees in the verandah. 
I was not aware of what doctors were doing inside Gurudev’s room. I sat facing the hall watching doctors entering the room and coming back and forth. Then a few ascetic members also entered his room. Then we were told to sing ‘Radha Kunda Tata Kunja Kutir’
 We completed that and again repeated the same kirtan. By now many people had gathered in the hall and the verandah. During the second time that bhajan was sung, a thunderbolt-like announcement came: “Our Gurudev left us!" What followed was indescribable.
 Who was telling us about an hour ago that there’s improvement?
 We just had prasad downstairs!
 How c...