He Smiled and Asked, "Do You Want Prasād?"

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Gurudev is like a Himalayan mountain and I am like an invisible bacteria sort of thing, how can I sing the glories of Guru Mahārāj?  

The other day I was witnessing a video of vaiṣṇavas glorifying Gurudev. One of Śrīla Bhakti Kumud Sant Gosvāmī Mahārāj's disciples was speaking about an incident when they had all gone with our Guru Mahārāj to a village in West Bengal and they were staying at a Vaiṣṇava's house who had arranged for prasād and kirtan. During prasād time. they were all complaining about the prasād saying that it is very ordinary, not so good. Gurudev heard this from his room upstairs and came down and chastised them. He said, "Our host is a devotee; though he is not a wealthy man, he has arranged for prasādam for all of us and has offered to Supreme Lord, and then it becomes mahā-prasād. And you are criticizing mahā-prasād? This is not right!" Hearing him, everybody was stunned. 

I recall an experience related to this topic from 2005 when we attended Rathayātrā for the first time.  Our group from Mumbai went to Gurudev's room and one by one were taking prasād from Gurudev. When I joined both my hands to receive prasād from Gurudev's hands, Gurudev just held the prasād in his hands as if to give me and then started to speak.

He said, "This is Jagannāth prasād, do you want prasād'? 

And I said, "Yes, Gurudev, I want."

He continued, "Do you know what happens when you take prasād?  

I asked him to please explain to me. Then he said, "Agar ye khayega samsar nashta ho jayega" (if you honor this prasād, your material life will be destroyed). 

He kept smiling and asked again, "Do you want prasād?  

I said, "Yes, Gurudev I want prasād." I was touched by his words.  

We know it is prasād and is non-different from Kṛṣṇa and when we honor this prasād, our material life will be destroyed.  When we were thus speaking to Guru Mahārāj there were also some Matajīs sitting behind us, our god-sisters from Punjab.  They were sort of complaining to Gurudev, you are speaking to Mumbai devotees and you are not speaking to us. Then Gurudev said, "Gurudev's mercy is equal to all disciples."  He did not say "my mercy," he meant Gurudev's mercy is equal to all his disciples.  

Once we were going to Māyāpur for parikramā from Mumbai about twenty years ago. I had a dream before going. Gurudev came in that dream and offered me something white in color. I was happy that we are soon going to have darśan of Gurudev. Before going to Māyāpur, we went for darśan of Gurudev in Kolkata.  We had darśan of Gurudev and I was very frank and openly talked with Gurudev, very shamelessly.  Now I feel I should not have done that.  

So when Gurudev was giving me prasād, it was a long matri (a crispy deep-fried snack) and I told him about my dream and said, "You were giving me some white prasād. As soon as he heard this he was indicating his sevāks by his finger to get that prasād and at that very moment one Bengali Matajī came with a pot full of rasagullas and she kept that in front of Gurudev. At that moment I did not know what to say, my dream came true. 

Gurudev is like a mother he has hundreds and thousands of times more love than a mother can have for her children. That Matajī brought rasagulla and I got it from the hands of Gurudev.  He is so merciful.  What more could I say?

—Jāhnava Dasi, Mumbai 

Spoken in English, excerpted with light editing applied. Source: Vaishnav-sabha for the glorification of Śrīla Gurudev in Honor of His disappearance day, 08 May 2021 




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