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He Gave You the Mantras, Not Me

Diksa was the occasion when only you and Guru Mahārāj are there. He was giving the mantras and I was chanting. There were a few words that were repeated in many mantras. I was thinking, what is this word that is repeated in many mantras?

While he was speaking, Guru Mahārāj stopped and said, do you want to know what is the meaning of this word?

That was the first time I realized, that whatever is in your heart, Guru Mahārāj knows that exactly.

After the dīkṣā ceremony, Guru Mahārāj came out and was watering tulasī. Because I was pregnant, I was staying a little far, I didn't want to stay in the crowd. Guru Mahārāj smiled at me. Afterward, Guru Mahārāj came and spoke to me. I couldn't believe he was speaking to me, because I was standing away from others.

He said, “Did you get dīkṣā today?”

I said, “yes.”

“Did you get dīkṣā mantras?”

I said, “yes.”

He said, “Who has given you dīkṣā mantras?

I said, “I got them from you.”

He said, “no, no, no,” and pointed at Param Gurudev’s room.

“You got dīkṣā mantras from him. He has given this service to me. He has given dīkṣā mantras to me, to you, to all of us. You perform these dīkṣā mantras properly, then Gurudev will be pleased, and then I will also be pleased. Isn't it?”



Now sometimes when I am not performing properly, I remember this instruction, If I do it properly, Param Gurudev will be pleased and then also Gurudev will also be pleased.
Then also for the first time, I saw the love that Gurudev has for Param Gurudev. I have seen with what intensity and love and reverence he goes inside of Param Gurudev's room.

I feel that whatever love and affection I have for Gurudev is nothing in front of what Gurudev has for Param Gurudev. The love that Gurudev has for Param Gurudev is beyond words and speech.

—Rukmini Dasi, Kolkata

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