Skip to main content

He Gave You the Mantras, Not Me

Diksa was the occasion when only you and Guru Mahārāj are there. He was giving the mantras and I was chanting. There were a few words that were repeated in many mantras. I was thinking, what is this word that is repeated in many mantras?

While he was speaking, Guru Mahārāj stopped and said, do you want to know what is the meaning of this word?

That was the first time I realized, that whatever is in your heart, Guru Mahārāj knows that exactly.

After the dīkṣā ceremony, Guru Mahārāj came out and was watering tulasī. Because I was pregnant, I was staying a little far, I didn't want to stay in the crowd. Guru Mahārāj smiled at me. Afterward, Guru Mahārāj came and spoke to me. I couldn't believe he was speaking to me, because I was standing away from others.

He said, “Did you get dīkṣā today?”

I said, “yes.”

“Did you get dīkṣā mantras?”

I said, “yes.”

He said, “Who has given you dīkṣā mantras?

I said, “I got them from you.”

He said, “no, no, no,” and pointed at Param Gurudev’s room.

“You got dīkṣā mantras from him. He has given this service to me. He has given dīkṣā mantras to me, to you, to all of us. You perform these dīkṣā mantras properly, then Gurudev will be pleased, and then I will also be pleased. Isn't it?”



Now sometimes when I am not performing properly, I remember this instruction, If I do it properly, Param Gurudev will be pleased and then also Gurudev will also be pleased.
Then also for the first time, I saw the love that Gurudev has for Param Gurudev. I have seen with what intensity and love and reverence he goes inside of Param Gurudev's room.

I feel that whatever love and affection I have for Gurudev is nothing in front of what Gurudev has for Param Gurudev. The love that Gurudev has for Param Gurudev is beyond words and speech.

—Rukmini Dasi, Kolkata

Popular posts from this blog

His Loving Presence is Offered Freely

In the summer of 1991, when I was still a young girl, I made my first memorable trip to India with my older sister Rukmini Devi dasi, and my late mother, Smt. Devamayi Devi dasi. We almost immediately went to Jagannath Puri with our mother's Pishi, the late Smt. Aruna Didi, a dear and loving disciple of Srila Gurudev, Sri Srimad Bhakti Ballabh Tirtha Goswami Maharaj, and her friend LakkhiDi. It was on Jagannath Puri Ratha Yatra Parikrama that I first got real darshan of both Srila Gurudev Srila Bhakti Ballabh Tirtha Maharaj and Srila Guru Maharaj Sri Srimad Bhakti Pramode Puri Goswami. (I try to respectfully refer to Srimad Bhakti Pramode Puri Goswami as “Srila Guru Maharaj” and Srila Bhakti Ballabh Tirtha Maharaj as “Srila Gurudev”.) I still remember Srila Gurudev, Srila Guru Maharaj, and Sri Srimad Bhakti Kumud Santa Maharaj all sitting together, very affectionately, doing very enthusiastic kirtan in Gundicha Mandir’s courtyard. It almost seems like a dream now.

My father, Rasa…

Remembering His Entrance Into Nitya Lila

Srila Gurudev was always intoxicated in Krishna-nama-sankirtan, whether or not externally conscious. He was lying on the bed and was seemingly unaware as he was not communicating with any one of us externally, but inwardly he was relishing Krishna-namasankirtan offered by the devotees and also inspired devotees from within to come and join sankirtan movement.

Those who performed the sankirtans those last days on earth are the true servants of Srila Gurudev. Even though the sevaks were attending to the immediate medical services of Srila Gurudev, one would think that the best service was done by those who performed kirtans. Of this, there is no doubt. 
Srila Gurudev could have concluded his pastimes much before but he chose this way to make us realize that the process of Krishna-nama-sankirtan is the only way by which everyone could stay united for a single purpose. Srila Prabhupad Bhakti Siddhanta Saraswati Goswami Thakur had mentioned in his antim-vani (final instructions) to offer …

He Speaks the Language of the Heart

In 2013, we spent a couple months with Srila Gurudeva in Goalpara. There weren't any other westerners for the first month or so there. I was feeling lonely because unfortunately I only speak English and others there generally didn't. People were trying to talk to me, but I felt awkward because I couldn't understand much. I felt sad due to emotions that arose in me relating to feeling isolated.

One evening during darshan, there were some local young ladies there that he addressed while motioning towards me. "You should love her from the core of your heart," he told them. "She does not speak your language," he continued. "She doesn't know anyone, and she is far from home. She left everything! Doesn't anyone here speak English? You talk with her!" he told them.

I looked at those girls and they seemed a little embarrassed. I was astounded to see him ordering them on my behalf. I felt ashamed that the object of my worship was concerned wit…