Bestowing Fearlessness Upon Those Who Reveal Their Hearts to Him

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When I was staying in Chakdah maṭha, an astrologer saw my palm and told me that I will get married. I was 28 years old then. I showed it to another palmist and he also confirmed that I will get married before I am 30 years of age. A third astrologer also said the same thing.

Those days I was serving Lord Jagannātha in Chakdah by the order of Gurudeva. I was not fickle-minded before. But when I became 28-29 years, I became a little restless. I tried to chant harināma intently and also chanted a lot of narasiṃha-mantra, but my mind did not calm down.

I was feeling that I would fall down and might enter in the family life. I tried a lot, but my mind was not calming down. I had no desire to enter mundane life. I thought to convey the condition of my mind to Gurujī. I thought only Gurujī can bring me out of that state of mind. 

Guru Mahārāja was in Tezpur maṭha for the annual function. I wrote my heart's feeling in a letter and posted it to Gurujī. Usually, it takes 6-7 days for a letter to reach Tezpur, but my letter reached him in 3 days. It seemed that my letter flew. 

Guru Mahārāja usually gives reply to letters serially. But when my letter reached Him, He immediately gave the reply, which I received within 7 days. The first thing Gurujī wrote in the letter was, "Simplicity is Vaiṣṇavaism." 

He also wrote, “You wrote the condition of your heart to me, I am very pleased with you. Lust is the heart disease of every soul for which a jīvā has to go through a cycle of millions of births. You honestly told me your condition, and that is why I am instructing you to remember this kirtana of Śrīla Bhaktivinoda Ṭhākura from Śaraṇāgati always: 

hari he!
prapañce poḍiyā,agati hoiyā,
nā dekhi upāyaār
agatira gati, caraṇeśaraṇa, tomāya korinu sār

  
He underlined this kirtana. "Always remember this kirtana," He said. "Do not fear.” 

When I read the letter, it seemed as if a lot of energy flowed through my body instantly. I felt that even Brahmajī cannot do anything to me. Gurujī said that I need not have fear, and that even if I fall, he will hold my hand and pick me up. I had this faith. At that time I was 29 years old, and today I am 59. I got Gurujī’s mercy which saved me from this mundane world.

—Śrīla Bhakti Kusala Padmanābha Mahārāja (2012)










Comments

  1. Gita dasiJuly 27, 2016 at 7:55 PM

    So beautiful! This is my experience of also, regardless of whether I receive a mail back or not. I think I will disclose my heart to Srila Gurudeva today...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Padmnabha DasAugust 1, 2016 at 12:38 PM

    I have a same condition like this, my heart is constantly running after all this mundane benefits and sense gratifications. I will certainly read above bhajan as and when possible. Thanks for sharing. Padmnabha Maharaj ki jai. Srila Gurudev Maharaj ki jai.

    ReplyDelete

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