His Words Are Like a Powerful Thunderbolt That Pierces Through the Mind and Into the Heart
Guru Mahārāj would often start his hari-kathā by saying:
guru, vaiṣṇava, bhagavān, — tinera smaraṇa
tinera smaraṇe haya vighna-vināśana
anāyāse haya nija vāñchita-pūraṇa
Guru Mahārāj would also often say, "Everything happens by the will of the Supreme Lord." And today I was thinking how come they have asked me to speak? There is nothing that happens without the will of the Supreme Lord, and Supreme Lord's grace incarnate form, Śrīla Gurudev obviously has showered his mercy that he is making me do this; this is for my own purification to be able to listen to all of you glorifying Gurudev and guru-tattva and for me to remember him. Actually, there is nothing better in life other than listening to and remembering our Gurudev and realizing the mercy that he has given us.
Guru Mahārāj always made it so easy; there was never anything difficult. Actually, nothing is coming from our own endeavor, we just need to pray; that is what we really need to do. I heard from Guru Mahārāj that the most important thing is to learn to pray sincerely from the core of our hearts, and he has shown us practically how to do it. Gurudev was a perfect example in everything that he taught. He appeared on the day of Rāmanavamī, and just as Rāmacandra exemplifies the perfect conduct, Śrīla Gurudev showed us the perfect conduct of a disciple.
Our Guru-varga has often said that he is the personification of the tṛṇād api sunīcena verse. In fact, when I received initiation, Guru Mahārāj was sitting in front of me and after initiation, he told me, "I am not your Gurudev." I was shocked to hear this, thoughts were racing through my head, thinking what did I do wrong? Then he said very softly and very firmly, "Your Gurudev is my Gurudev, after initiation you go to his room, and pay your obeisances to him, he is your Gurudev." Such is his humility and sole identification as the servant of his Gurudev in every action he took. I just never stopped being amazed by his humility. There is so much to say and I feel like my throat, my heart is too small, I just want to explode it all out and do not know how. I will try my best to put it into words.
When I look back at my life, I was born in a family of vaiṣṇavas and I am blessed by that, but due to bad association, I didn’t come in contact with Śrīla Gurudev until much later. I actually grew up much in Māyāpur and was living practically in front of Sree Caitanya Gauḍīya Maṭh. I feel that the lines from this bhajan apply to me: emona durmati, saḿsāra bhitore, poḍiyā āchinu āmi... When I first met my Guru Mahārāj I was working in America. Fortunately, I was in the association of devotees, but unfortunately, my mind was not concentrated on my spiritual life. That is when Guru Mahārāj came all the way to America, and I personally feel that he had come especially for me. I really feel that Śrīla Guru Mahārāj just like Kṛṣṇa has a very specific relationship with each devotee and each disciple who comes in contact with him and I strongly believe that he came personally to rescue me.
He is unlimited, he is not conditioned, he is a self-realized soul, so he can definitely be at many places at a time and he can have close relationships with each and every disciple without his relationship with one disciple becoming lessened because he is more intimate with another disciple. About Guru Mahārāj's teachings, one thing he stressed a lot and which he taught by his example is how to do everything from the core of our heart—not mechanically, to do everything with meaning and presence. He practically demonstrated it the way he would pay his obeisances, do his invocations before hari-kathā, water Tulasī Devī, and offer flowers to his beloved Gurudev—everything he did was so heartfelt and profoundly sincere.
One time in America we went to a preaching program and it was quite far. By the time we reached, there wasn't much time left, but instead of doing a quick invocation so that he could give hari-kathā, he took the exact same time. For those who have seen how Guru Mahārāj does his invocations before speaking, it is just amazing, it is a class in itself; he never compromised on that. He sat peacefully, fully engrossed, and immersed in reciting his invocation. He did this because he always taught that without the mercy of Guru, Vaiṣṇav, and Bhagavān it is impossible to speak hari-kathā. When he does his invocation, you feel that the whole guru-paraṃpara is present there, coming through him. So he showed how everything we do we should do very sincerely.
Then he would laugh and say, "Now you say it from the core of your heart! Can you do it?" I have only just begun this journey, but I feel so hopeful to have such a divine Spiritual Master who has kindly graced me, he is so compassionate and he is giving exactly what we need at the level we are at so that ultimately we will reach our highest welfare which is service to Sri Rādhākṛṣṇa's lotus feet in our real home.
One godbrother once said how Guru Mahārāj appeared on Rāmanavamī and made his disappearance pastime on Kṛṣṇanavamī; this showed us that by following the exemplary lifestyle of Śrī Rāmachandra we will attain Śrī Kṛṣṇa.
During the final līlās, Śrīla Guru Mahārāj engaged everyone in singing the bhajans of Śrīla Bhaktivinoda Ṭhākur and Śrīla Narottam Das Ṭhākur for so many days non-stop, even those who were unable to come were able to be present through webcast. In this way, our dearmost Śrīla Gurudev disappeared from our vision while listening to his favorite bhajan rādhā-kunḍa-taṭa-kuñja-kuṭīr. That was his meditation and mood and all his teachings are to take us there.
He is unlimited, he is not conditioned, he is a self-realized soul, so he can definitely be at many places at a time and he can have close relationships with each and every disciple without his relationship with one disciple becoming lessened because he is more intimate with another disciple. About Guru Mahārāj's teachings, one thing he stressed a lot and which he taught by his example is how to do everything from the core of our heart—not mechanically, to do everything with meaning and presence. He practically demonstrated it the way he would pay his obeisances, do his invocations before hari-kathā, water Tulasī Devī, and offer flowers to his beloved Gurudev—everything he did was so heartfelt and profoundly sincere.
One time in America we went to a preaching program and it was quite far. By the time we reached, there wasn't much time left, but instead of doing a quick invocation so that he could give hari-kathā, he took the exact same time. For those who have seen how Guru Mahārāj does his invocations before speaking, it is just amazing, it is a class in itself; he never compromised on that. He sat peacefully, fully engrossed, and immersed in reciting his invocation. He did this because he always taught that without the mercy of Guru, Vaiṣṇav, and Bhagavān it is impossible to speak hari-kathā. When he does his invocation, you feel that the whole guru-paraṃpara is present there, coming through him. So he showed how everything we do we should do very sincerely.
Another thing I remember Gurudev taught me was, "If you want quantity, you will have to sacrifice your quality." One time in our Kolkata Maṭh, Guru Mahārāj explained how when we offer our obeisances we should not bow down and simply murmur some prayers. He said, "When you pay obeisances you should pray, "Oh Gurudev! Please rescue me! Please give me one-pointed devotion to Supreme Lord!" At every single moment, we have an opportunity to connect to Gurudev, to connect with Kṛṣṇa, and ask them for our highest welfare, so why would we miss the opportunity? At any moment we may die. That is something Gurudev always said also, "At any moment we may die, so don't waste time!’ Just like when an awakened person sees a blazing fire coming, and he wants everybody to wake up, wake up, please take this opportunity! Guru Mahārāj’s compassion overflows from his heart.
Those who got the chance to participate in his kirtans in person will know how it is like Śrī Caitanya-caritāmṛta coming to life; it is like Śrīvās Angan coming to life. We have heard and read about Mahāprabhu's kirtans but we do not know what it looks like in practical life, so Guru Mahārāj comes and shows us practically what it means to do kirtan, practically what it means to chant the mahāmantra and to call out to the Lord from the core of our hearts. Śrīla Bhakti Pramod Puri Gosvāmī Mahārāj said that when Śrīla Bhakti Ballabh Tirtha Gosvāmī Mahārāj does kirtan, Gaur Nityananda come and dance!
One time I was in Bhubaneswar I suddenly found Fakir Mohan Prabhu before me. He gave me some instructions and asked who I was initiated by. When I told him, he said, "Your Guru Mahārāj is not an ordinary person, go there right now and fall at the feet of your Guru Mahārāj and ask for some instruction!" When I reached Kolkata, I went and paid my obeisances and asked Guru Mahārāj please give me some instructions. He looked at me for some time and spoke some verses starting with jalajā nava-lakṣāṇi that emphasized that human birth is so rare. I said, "Yes, I know" and nodded my head. He continued, "And more importantly this Kali-yuga is so rare because Mahāprabhu has appeared! You chant from the core of your heart!" And when he said this, it hit me like a thunderbolt. His words were so powerful like a thunderbolt that pierces through the confusion of the mind and goes inside the heart and makes you understand factually what is meant by those words. I heard this so many times: "chant from the core of your heart" and other teachings as well, but Guru Mahārāj's words are invested with such transcendental potency that it goes beyond the mental and subtle plane and touches the soul, even the vibration of his words are so purifying.
I did not have that many occasions to be around Guru Mahārāj, but every single moment with Gurudev is nityalīlā; it is eternal, it is transcendental, it is beyond time and I can connect back into that līlā, back into that moment with Guru Mahārāj where time stands still and the instructions that he gave me, his presence and compassionate glance are still there. So I would just like to say that we can always connect with our Gurudev at any moment even if he is not present in this world anymore. He has not disappeared; he is in our heart, he is in the heart of all his disciples, he is unlimited, he is antaryāmī, the indweller of all hearts. He has proven this many times.
Sometimes we would go into his room with some questions and before even asking the question he would answer the question. And sometimes we would ask a question and he would reply with something completely different and I thought maybe he did not understand my question. But actually, Guru Mahārāj is antaryāmī, he has laser eyes, he can see deep into the dungeon of the heart and see the actual root cause of my question and my suffering, and he will answer that, he knows me better than I do, he wants our own welfare more then we do. His answers act like powerful mantras, his answers were always based on shastric evidence. He would answer questions by quoting verses from Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam or other scriptures and as time goes on, as days go on, as months go on, as years go on, the answer reveals itself, unfolding in ways that I can apply for the rest of my life.
Guru Mahārāj emphasized a lot on śaraṇāgati, on calling out the Lord from the core of our heart, without ulterior desires. Sometimes in hari-kathā he would ask the devotees to say:
[Śrī Caitanya-caritāmṛta, Antya 20.29, Śikṣāṣṭaka 4]
Those who got the chance to participate in his kirtans in person will know how it is like Śrī Caitanya-caritāmṛta coming to life; it is like Śrīvās Angan coming to life. We have heard and read about Mahāprabhu's kirtans but we do not know what it looks like in practical life, so Guru Mahārāj comes and shows us practically what it means to do kirtan, practically what it means to chant the mahāmantra and to call out to the Lord from the core of our hearts. Śrīla Bhakti Pramod Puri Gosvāmī Mahārāj said that when Śrīla Bhakti Ballabh Tirtha Gosvāmī Mahārāj does kirtan, Gaur Nityananda come and dance!
One time I was in Bhubaneswar I suddenly found Fakir Mohan Prabhu before me. He gave me some instructions and asked who I was initiated by. When I told him, he said, "Your Guru Mahārāj is not an ordinary person, go there right now and fall at the feet of your Guru Mahārāj and ask for some instruction!" When I reached Kolkata, I went and paid my obeisances and asked Guru Mahārāj please give me some instructions. He looked at me for some time and spoke some verses starting with jalajā nava-lakṣāṇi that emphasized that human birth is so rare. I said, "Yes, I know" and nodded my head. He continued, "And more importantly this Kali-yuga is so rare because Mahāprabhu has appeared! You chant from the core of your heart!" And when he said this, it hit me like a thunderbolt. His words were so powerful like a thunderbolt that pierces through the confusion of the mind and goes inside the heart and makes you understand factually what is meant by those words. I heard this so many times: "chant from the core of your heart" and other teachings as well, but Guru Mahārāj's words are invested with such transcendental potency that it goes beyond the mental and subtle plane and touches the soul, even the vibration of his words are so purifying.
I did not have that many occasions to be around Guru Mahārāj, but every single moment with Gurudev is nityalīlā; it is eternal, it is transcendental, it is beyond time and I can connect back into that līlā, back into that moment with Guru Mahārāj where time stands still and the instructions that he gave me, his presence and compassionate glance are still there. So I would just like to say that we can always connect with our Gurudev at any moment even if he is not present in this world anymore. He has not disappeared; he is in our heart, he is in the heart of all his disciples, he is unlimited, he is antaryāmī, the indweller of all hearts. He has proven this many times.
Sometimes we would go into his room with some questions and before even asking the question he would answer the question. And sometimes we would ask a question and he would reply with something completely different and I thought maybe he did not understand my question. But actually, Guru Mahārāj is antaryāmī, he has laser eyes, he can see deep into the dungeon of the heart and see the actual root cause of my question and my suffering, and he will answer that, he knows me better than I do, he wants our own welfare more then we do. His answers act like powerful mantras, his answers were always based on shastric evidence. He would answer questions by quoting verses from Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam or other scriptures and as time goes on, as days go on, as months go on, as years go on, the answer reveals itself, unfolding in ways that I can apply for the rest of my life.
Guru Mahārāj emphasized a lot on śaraṇāgati, on calling out the Lord from the core of our heart, without ulterior desires. Sometimes in hari-kathā he would ask the devotees to say:
na dhanaṁ na janaṁ na sundarīṁ
kavitāṁ vā jagad-īśa kāmaye
mama janmani janmanīśvare
bhavatād bhaktir ahaitukī tvayi
[Śrī Caitanya-caritāmṛta, Antya 20.29, Śikṣāṣṭaka 4]
Then he would laugh and say, "Now you say it from the core of your heart! Can you do it?" I have only just begun this journey, but I feel so hopeful to have such a divine Spiritual Master who has kindly graced me, he is so compassionate and he is giving exactly what we need at the level we are at so that ultimately we will reach our highest welfare which is service to Sri Rādhākṛṣṇa's lotus feet in our real home.
One godbrother once said how Guru Mahārāj appeared on Rāmanavamī and made his disappearance pastime on Kṛṣṇanavamī; this showed us that by following the exemplary lifestyle of Śrī Rāmachandra we will attain Śrī Kṛṣṇa.
During the final līlās, Śrīla Guru Mahārāj engaged everyone in singing the bhajans of Śrīla Bhaktivinoda Ṭhākur and Śrīla Narottam Das Ṭhākur for so many days non-stop, even those who were unable to come were able to be present through webcast. In this way, our dearmost Śrīla Gurudev disappeared from our vision while listening to his favorite bhajan rādhā-kunḍa-taṭa-kuñja-kuṭīr. That was his meditation and mood and all his teachings are to take us there.
So, if we just stay at the lotus feet of our spiritual master, he will definitely take us to the highest level. We are so so so fortunate, there are no words to express how fortunate we are to be in contact with such a Gurudev who is an eternal associate of the Supreme Lord and who has come down from the spiritual world simply to rescue us. It is impossible for me to properly express my gratitude nor do I even realize the priceless treasure of love and compassion that Gurudev is giving us, I can only do my best to try to please him by following his instructions to the best of my ability.
I pray to all you vaiṣṇavas to kindly bless me with guru-nistha.
Thank you very much to all sannyāsīs, to all vaiṣṇavas and vaiṣṇavis, my heartfelt dandavat pranams to you all. Any mistake I may have said it is all my fault, and if I have said anything good it is by the blessings of Śrīla Gurudev. Please accept my humble obeisance: vāñchā-kalpatarubhyaś ca kṛpā-sindhubhya eva capatitānāṁ pāvanebhyo vaiṣṇavebhyo namo namaḥ.
—Revati Dasi (France)
I pray to all you vaiṣṇavas to kindly bless me with guru-nistha.
Thank you very much to all sannyāsīs, to all vaiṣṇavas and vaiṣṇavis, my heartfelt dandavat pranams to you all. Any mistake I may have said it is all my fault, and if I have said anything good it is by the blessings of Śrīla Gurudev. Please accept my humble obeisance: vāñchā-kalpatarubhyaś ca kṛpā-sindhubhya eva capatitānāṁ pāvanebhyo vaiṣṇavebhyo namo namaḥ.
—Revati Dasi (France)
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