Praṇamāmi Guru Tīrtha Padaṁ

I often feel that to try to sing Gurudev's glories is like worshipping the Sun by offering a small lamp. Guru Mahārāja's lifestyle, his ideals, his conduct, his kathā , and  kirtan  which we have seen are all so wonderful; it is not possible to describe. Guru Mahārāja must have had great experiences while visiting various sādhus , places, and through various pastimes, but he never shared them in his hari-kathā with the purpose of boasting about himself. Often he was heard speaking about his Gurudev; he always repeated his Gurudev's hari-kathā as it is. He was the embodiment of the phrase guru-gata-prana . While narrating the pastime that occurred during the time of Param Gurudev's disappearance, Gurudev told, "When I was performing parikramā in Aniyor near Govinda Kunda, before entering Jatipura (a small village on the parikramā marg ) I met a small boy. He told me to stop parikramā . ‘You are very tired,’ he insisted. I told him I am not tired and that I have t...

My Gurudev is an unsurpassed personality; what can I say about Him? With my minus qualifications, this is impossible. But I will make an attempt to glorify Srila Gurudeva for my own purification.  I can't say I was looking for Him on purpose. Rather, He found me. In the Summer of 2011, I joined ISKCON. I got acquainted there with the basics of the practice and was shocked by the personality of Srila A.C. Bhaktivedanta Prabhupada. Despite the fact that He left this planet a long time ago, inside I had a desire to have a guru like Him, although I hardly understood who Srila Prabhupada was and where this desire came from in me. Later I met my husband, who is a disciple of Srila Bhaktivedanta Narayana Goswami Maharaj. In January 2013, I had a spontaneous desire to have a guru like Srila Narayana Goswami Maharaj. And again I didn't understand what it was. But this thought penetrated deep into the heart.  
In the Spring of that year, my husband's guru-brother went to India, he wa...

A poem that was written in Kolkata the day before Srila Guru Maharaja entered nitya-lila: 🌸  I came here only for Guruji But now it's become all about me As I opened my heart so wide I let something rotten come inside I introspect that it got in to find The stale rotten things within my mind And with a kicking punching fight  It might just kick them far out of sight But even more now I feel unqualified to be Where love is here flowing freely We're sharing love of Guruji Our love for him makes him happy But it became all about me Why aren't I thinking gratefully? I guess that I received too much more Mercy than I'm ready for. That's a good thing, no doubt there But when will I pray with love and care? There's just one thing going on here The name of Krishna loud and clear 24 hours for so many days now Krishna's​ name is sung and Kolkata says, "Wow!" In the streets below people hear and dance While on the roof we sing in trance An opportunity so mys...

I was actually hiding today because I really do not like this day as it is always painful for me—after four years I feel a blockage inside to speak because this departure of Gurudev was the biggest and most difficult thing I have experienced in this spiritual life.  It feels so hard, so I was trying to hide today—but then I said, “no," go on the screen and just share and be present with the devotees. It is beautiful and I received a lot to hear all of you remembering Guru Mahārāj. I don't know what to really say about him. Right now I just have a very fine and tender connection with Guru Mahārāj, it is not about the big, mystic, miraculous things that he has done—it is something softer, it is his continuous presence that is always with me whatever I am doing.  Two days ago I was thinking he really saved me when I was thinking about the difference in my life between before I met him and now—this is like darkness and light.  Just by surrendering to him, so many things chang...

Gurudev taught us about how important it is to observe a vaiṣṇava 's  āvirbhāv and tirobhāv-tithis . Only when we follow their teachings may it be considered that we have really observed the tithi of those vaiṣṇavas . In 1988 Gurudeva gave me the shelter of his divine lotus feet. In the initial days, although I had some taste for service,  I found I was not able to chant hāriṇam properly and could not develop any mood of service to Gurudev. I placed this doubt to Pūjyapāda Śrīla Bhakti Prasād Puri Gosvāmī Mahārāj, Vṛndāvana Maṭh-in-charge. He wrote me a brief letter explaining the glories of Gurudev in which he explained, “One has to always remember the lotus feet of Gurudeva and chant hāriṇama sincerely with faith and reverence.” Later when I met him in Vṛndāvana, he told me to attain such a sadguru who is the Absolute Counterpart of Supreme Lord Sri Kṛṣṇa is extremely rare. Gurudeva has given us so many teachings and instructions, but the fault on our side is not follow...