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He Will Go, But He Will Not Go

One day Guru Maharaj suddenly got very restless and started saying, I have to go to Goalpara, I have to go to Goalpara! So Prasad Prabhu asked me to please explain to Gurudev that I think it's not right for him to travel at this point of time. "Why don't you wait?" I asked.

Very sweetly Guru Maharaj agreed, but when I went out, he started saying the same thing again– I have to go to Goalpara, I have to go to Goalpara!

That night, I had a dream of Guru Maharaj. I saw my childhood school where I studied until standard six. I saw the assembly area of that school and Guru Maharaj was lying there, lying so very still. I went there and put his head on my lap and asked, "What is happening? Why are you lying here?"

He told me, “I am going. I will go, but I will not go.” It didn't make any sense at that time to me.

The next day, I came to know that he forced everybody to go to Goalpara. Prahlad Prabhu informed me after some days that Guru Maharaj had become unwell there and had to be admitted to the hospital. He wasn't talking and communicating then.

I remembered that dream and then it made sense that probably this is what he meant when he said that, ”I am going but I am not going" – that I won’t communicate externally any further. From then on, it has been like this.

—Dr. Amitava Mukerjee
(part 3 of 3)

Srila Gurudeva's lotus hands in divine gestures as if chanting on his mala. This was observed within a few months of the hospital release mentioned in the above post.


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